Win a copy of Sandy’s book

LIGHTENING Ridge yarnspinner Sandy Thorne is possibly the only person who could find something funny about being in hospital.
Nanjing Night Net

During a recent long stay in an orthopaedic ward, she found plenty of hilarious incidents to put in her latest book, Bedpan Blues.

The author of several best-sellers, filled in the long days typing up all the humourous and horrible things about being stuck in a public ward.

“By the second day in there, I thought to myself ‘I’ve got to write all this stuff down’,” she said.

“I had to work hard on seeing the funny side of things like the nurses waking you up out of a deep sleep to give you two Panadol; or asking, in megaphone tones, in front of a wardful of patients and visitors – ‘Have you worked your bowels today?’ When I replied, equally loudly, ‘Yes, I cantered them in circles for half and hour, then popped them over a some low jumps’. I didn’t make the oh-so-discreet nurse laugh, but everyone else in the ward did.”

Battles with the dreaded bedpan are described in hilarious style. (With a bandaged leg that’s unusable, getting on a bedpan’s one thing, getting off it presents a truly tremendous challenge.)

Then there were the “mystery meals” sent in from a prison.

“If anything would make you obey the law and stay out of jail, they would. That the hospital’s kitchens are now closed down, all those workers put out of work, was almost as astounding to me, as the standards of cleaning.

“Instead of the permanent cleaners who used to take such a pride in their polished floors and spotless surfaces, an outside contractor now employs students who seem to have a contest going to see who can swing a broom or mop with the least enthusiasm.”

The names of the hospital, staff and patients have all been changed, allowing this writer of several successful books about humourous bush characters, to describe in vivid, entertaining detail, the succession of patients she shared her ward with: drug addicts, ratbags, and ethnics whose noisy, never-ending crowds of visitors – allowed to take over the entire ward due to political correctness – nearly drove the writer nuts.

Political correctness is thrown to the wind as the multi-cultural microcosm of a Sydney hospital is put under her microscope.

Amongst the incisive humour Sandy uses to describe everyday life in an orthopaedic ward, is her recurring message that Australia’s governments send vast sums of taxpayers money to overseas countries, while our hospitals are desperate for funds.

Released in time for Father’s Day, Bedpan Blues is being promoted as an ideal tonic for someone who’s a bit crook or just needs a good laugh, and is available from all good booksellers, including locally.

But, if you would like to win a free copy of Sandy’s book here’s how:

All you have to do to win is cut out the masthead from today’s paper and either mail it or drop it in to Moree Champion, 12-14 Balo Street, Moree, NSW 2400 by 5pm on Thursday. The winner will be notified on Friday – just in case it’s a present for Dad!

This story Administrator ready to work first appeared on Nanjing Night Net.

Posted by at 22/03/2019
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